{"id":1272,"date":"2024-10-07T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-10-07T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/2024\/10\/07\/people-pleasers\/"},"modified":"2026-04-29T00:16:10","modified_gmt":"2026-04-29T06:16:10","slug":"people-pleasers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/2024\/10\/07\/people-pleasers\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Break the Cycle of People Pleasing and Serve God With A Pure Heart"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>People pleasers unite! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We&#8217;re a club that none of us really want to be in but, oops, here we are because we feel too bad to tell the others that we want out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8230;we don&#8217;t want to hurt their feelings! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8230;we don&#8217;t want to seem &#8220;difficult.&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8230;we want to make sure they know we love and value them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>The excuses go on and on and on.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When you make a decision to follow Jesus, the line between being a &#8220;good human&#8221; and being a people pleaser becomes a little harder to differentiate. At least it did for me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You want to be a good example of Jesus&#8217; love so you bend over backwards for people and promise that if they come over to &#8220;our side&#8221; we will give them COOKIES. And not oatmeal raisin &#8211; CHOCOLATE CHIP.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/4\/2026\/04\/iStock-1305064913-1-1024x469.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-165786\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Years ago, I had a pastor ask me how much it mattered what people thought of me on a scale from 1-10&#8230; I answered 200 AND I WAS NOT EXAGGERATING.&nbsp; That really <strong>opened my eyes<\/strong> to this issue.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Can I be a little harsh? People pleasing seems like a really sweet and selfless problem to have but in reality, I think it comes down to a <strong>desire to control<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Oof!! Not really a people pleasing message huh? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I am a recovering <a href=\"https:\/\/star991.com\/yes-i-am-a-control-addict\/\">control addict<\/a> so when I see areas in my life that scream CONTROL FREAK, I have to call them out. And when I really examine my people pleasing tendencies&#8230;it&#8217;s all rooted in that desire to control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Serving people is part of being a follower of Christ. It&#8217;s a good thing. But when we serve in order to please people rather than God, it can leave us feeling empty. We might even feel a little mad or taken advantage of in our service.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes, it becomes about me wanting to control the narrative.&nbsp;I want people to say, &#8220;wow look at Kristen! She&#8217;s such a servant! She&#8217;s got such a giving heart.&#8221; I want to control how people see Christians. It sounds so icky right? It&#8217;s hard to admit it, but it&#8217;s true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>But God loves a CHEERFUL giver<\/strong>. He wants us to serve because we love Him, not because we want to look good in front of other people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So with God&#8217;s guidance, I got to work. I posted this scripture on my wall to read every single day:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.&#8221; &#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.biblegateway.com\/passage\/?search=galatians+1&amp;version=NLT\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Galatians 1:10<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n<p>When I start to feel the pull of a desire to please people, I have to ask myself this question: &#8220;Am I doing this for God or for me and my image?&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And <strong>if the answer isn&#8217;t God<\/strong>, then I need to reevaluate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Many of us struggle with this problem, even if we don&#8217;t want to admit it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So I&#8217;ll be the one to take the first step.  I&#8217;m breaking the ice and admitting that I&#8217;m a people pleaser.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m praying that God opens our eyes to our motivations so that we can <strong>better serve Him<\/strong> and say no to the things that aren&#8217;t going to benefit our relationship with Him.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Kristen James<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Midday Show Host, STAR 99.1<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When you make a decision to follow Jesus, the line between being a &#8220;good human&#8221; and being a people pleaser becomes a little harder to differentiate.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":1273,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[24,28,84],"class_list":["post-1272","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spiritual-growth","tag-encouragement","tag-inspiration","tag-spiritual-growth"],"acf":[],"publishpress_future_action":{"enabled":false,"date":"2026-05-15 23:38:03","action":"change-status","newStatus":"draft","terms":[],"taxonomy":"category","extraData":[]},"publishpress_future_workflow_manual_trigger":{"enabledWorkflows":[]},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1272","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/23"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1272"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1272\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1273"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1272"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1272"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/upliftingstar.com\/star1015denver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}