Thanksgiving is over and Christmas is just around the corner. Some of you gathered around a long table with a large family this past week, while others shared an intimate meal with a few. It\u2019s that time of the year where we will travel, gather, and, in the coming weeks, will be surrounded by more and more people. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As we prepare for the most wonderful (but perhaps the most stressful) time of the year, we are sure to encounter conflict at one point or another. It could be while you\u2019re driving down the parkway as someone cuts you off or being amongst family members who don\u2019t get along.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I recently found myself in a situation where two people whom I care for do not care\u00a0for each other. It was any peacemaker\u2019s nightmare. It created a tension-filled atmosphere that was awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As you step into this season, here are a few reminders of how we can approach conflict, no matter what the circumstance is, through God\u2019s word:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Thankfully, God has promised us that we do not have to deal with any of it alone. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Don\u2019t get me wrong\u2026I\u2019m still learning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
There are times when I will try to deal with it myself, but His Word reminds us that it is through our weakness that His power is made perfect (1 Corinthians 12:9). God is perfect in every way, and He expects us to give Him the power to make up for any weakness we have. This is true whether the weakness we feel amid conflict as a result of hurt, disrespect, injustice, disagreement, or something else entirely. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Our knee jerk reaction is to protect ourselves, defend ourselves, or justify ourselves. Sometimes we forgo all moral values to fulfill that reaction. I know this because I have been there, and nothing has helped me more than seeking and heavily relying on God in those situations. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Once the conflict presents itself, we must decide what our end goal is. Is it to seek peace, at the very least, and to perhaps seek reconciliation? Or Is it to \u201cwin\u201d? Our flesh will always want us to win while His Spirit will always remind us to be peacemakers (Matthew 5:9). If pursuing peace is our goal, then all our words and actions will be defined by that goal, and it will produce a roadmap for us to follow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The number one thing that causes most of our conflicts is the lack of understanding and information. Too often we jump to conclusions and make assumptions rather than choosing to understand and fill in the gaps we don\u2019t even realize we have. So, ask questions! Then\u2026ask some more! After that, ask more! Questions help us stand in humility while helping us interpret circumstances in a much more wholesome way. We begin to see parts of the picture we didn\u2019t know existed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Withholding how we truly feel in order to spare someone\u2019s feelings is unfair to that individual. We rob them of a chance to correct anything that may need to be corrected or provide us with the knowledge that would help us understand more. We are too quick to say, \u201cI don\u2019t wanna deal with it\u201d and it may seem easier to run away from the situation rather than confront it with a conversation in the moment. In reality, we bury it until it crawls up to the surface when it is triggered again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
All honesty without any love is not healthy either. Paul warns us to not be like the clanging symbols who may have plenty of honesty and wisdom but lack love. (1 Corinthian 13:1). Scripture tells us that love covers a multitude of sins. Our tone, pace, volume, time, and place all play an important role in ensuring that our honesty is being presented with love. It allows for others to receive what we must share even if they may disagree.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There may not be any resolution at the end of the day\u00a0if any\u00a0members of the party are not ready to pursue peace. Our goal will always be to honor God in all that we do no matter how the world reacts around us. (1 Corinthians 10:31). It could be as simple as reflecting on what the person who cut you off\u00a0on the road\u00a0is going through that day and\u00a0choosing\u00a0to let it go<\/a>. It could be knowing very well that someone is not ready to receive you or communicate\u00a0and giving them the space and time they need.\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n7. Pray for peace<\/h2>\n\n\n\n